cankle

My ankle, I'm sorry, cankle still freaking hurts on day seven! So on the way home yesterday I was passing the hospital and pulled into the ER on two wheels at the last minute. Screw it, lets go get an X-Ray, what the hay. I am sick of my nickname, Half-speed, and I needed to know if my flat tire needed more air, a patch or a replacement. It turns out that I just pulled some ligaments which is a fancy way of saying I have a very bad sprain. My cute, married ER doctor sent me home with some drugs and no cast! Hey hey hey my fatass ankle and I are gonna spend the day being loopy and pain free....very exciting.

Bachelorette spolier alert

Plan C is Brandy is coming home early and picking up Kilo while I am at work tomorrow. So me and my little loner pooch are having a spend the night party in my bed.

After a fun filled weekend in the sun with the Half-Circle at Brandy’s fabulous brand new pool I am bushed! I am afraid that my insomnia has reared its ugly head. My sleep is slipping away and it sucks! I was grumpy and worthless at work today so I must go to bed in few minutes.

I had to stay up and watch Emily send home the 3rd to the last guy on the Bachelorette. Shocked! But I knew the second he showed up in the ridiculously low-cut blue V-neck T-shirt, fuchsia shorts and matching slippers that he was a goner....sucks for you! I am excited to see the finale, I haven’t been this invested in this show in years.

Well that is all I got for today. Special thanks to my Bestie for her hospitality...hopefully I will be invited back. She may still be mad at me for locking all of her doors to her house. I did this just in time for the fence guy (Dug) to drive an hour to her house.  The plan was for him to install the fence while she was gone. Oops, good thing he is a guy who can break in first and then fix it later. Its hard to get into the habit of never locking your doors..sorry girl.

Day 270 plan B

Hey Steph, make sure you volunteer to watch your best friend's dog while she is out of town. Bum foot or not you need to do this one favor for her. Don't think it through just do it!

Ok thanks subconscious, you really know what you’re doing. It’s real fun to hop on one foot at mock speeds to chase down an 8 lbs. professional cat chaser. I had no idea this was one of his hobbies. I took him down to the gym to see if he wanted to get a good walk in on the treadmill. I don't really think Kilo grasped the general concept of this machine. He thought it was more like a surfing machine rather than a way to take a walk while the Aunt Steph is handicapped. He sort of just flew off the back and looked pretty confused when I wanted him to try it again. Hhhhhmmm I need to go to work and come up with plan B.

I'll be back after of work....

Day 269 lucky ducky?

Ok so after Kelly brought my spare key to me on the 4th (smartest decision I ever made was giving my spare keys to her) me and my bum foot had quite a day at work yesterday. My foot is bad; it looks like it should be attached to a 300lb Smurf.

 My co-workers have diagnosed it as a very bad sprain and since everyone is an expert, there is no need to go to the doctor. Apparently the color blue that has taken over my foot and the swelling are not signs of a fracture because I can move my toes and ankle. I have a strict rotation of ice, elevation, Ibuprofren, Epson salt and a brace.  Vera, our receptionist and her broken leg are heeling nicely so she let me take her wheel chair for the day. I now have a new appreciation for the disabled. I did however get a kick out of people wheeling me down the hall at mock speeds just for fun.

I went out during my lunch hour yesterday to search for my keys. I went back to the scene of the crime, the area where the sidewalk jumped up and took me down like a champ. I went into the Hilton for my “shot in the dark” option. Nope they didn't have them but man was that a nice establishment. I looked in the bushes out front and came up empty handed. One last spot to try, Legends, but I didn't think to go in there earlier because I merely stopped in there to use the restroom and that was it. I go in head hung low and bounced out of there cheering, they had them the whole time! I know what I did, while looking for my deodorant at the bottom of my purse (because I have a spare deodorant at all times) I laid my keys on the sink! Woohoo! Victory! Now I can get into my office, do my laundry, go to the gym, get the mail, and put all of my spares back in their places. I am one lucky ducky!

I have been briefly chitchatting with Meredith's musician friend, Clay, per her instructions of course....things are sorta kinda starting to a little bit somewhat take shape with this guy. He ain't making it easy and that is actually a good thing...keep me on my toes I say!

 After work Kelly and I are heading to the country for the ribbon cutting event of Brandy's bomb-ass pool! Its finally installed and waiting on us! So appreciative of her upgrading my country home!

inevitable

Well the 3rd of July had Spazwell written all over it. This is the night of the concert. I get off work and have just enough time to freshen up. I wash my face and then realize that I left all of my makeup at work! Crap! What in the hell am I supposed to do now? I have 20 minutes to figure it out. I start digging in old purses and old traveling bags and found random old makeup. I slap on some crusty foundation from the mid-80s, found a teeny tiny bit of bronzer that I crush up with my fingernail and put it on with my fingers like it was war paint. I did however have my mascara, so aside from being a bit shiny and orange I think I turned out ok. I throw on my cowboy hat and sunglasses just in case.

The concert was hilarious, good ol Bret Michaels still working it, singing about a thorny rose. Def Leopard was awesome, I was pretty impressed, and especially after I found out that the drummer only has on arm. One arm?? That is one busy arm! They played all the favorites and I befriended the token drunk mom who probably hasn't been out of the house since most of the songs debuted.

We left the concert and the real fun began. I step on this weird elevated sidewalk in front of the Hilton as we were walking to the car. I didn't see it coming it being midnight at all, I stepped on it wrong, tripped and rolled my ankle. I am now lying in the middle of the side walk in some serious pain. I have zero tolerance for any kind of pain, I freakin paper cut can ruin my entire morning so this is about to get dramatic. I can't even walk at this point and I am convinced my ankle is broken. My friend, Hank leaves me on the sidewalk and goes and gets the car. By the time he gets back I had a guy sitting next to me allowing me to use him as a foot stool. Hank picks me up and puts me in the car. After a long debate on whether to go the hospital or not, we opted to just take me home and I would see how it looked in the morning. After I get carried up to my apartment I go to unlock my door and my keys are gone!!! AAHHH! Seriously? When, how and why?? I didn't even need my keys so why would they be gone?  I don't panic since I do have some experience with misplacing my belonging, I remain calm. Hank took me to his apartment which is 30 minutes away, thank goodness he is a total nice guy and gentlemen and is pretending to be patient with me in train wreck mode. He carries me to the stairs and I hop on one foot up three flights of stairs. He gives me some Advil, ice, wraps and elevates my foot and tucks me in and he went and slept on the couch.

I wake up the next morning with one fat and blue ankle. It’s pretty swollen; it looks like I have a baseball attached to it. So yesterday, it being the 4th, I opted to go the pool and ice it for 30 minutes or until the ice melted whichever came first on and off all day. The original plan was to go downtown and watch the fireworks, but that was when I had two working feet. I did get to hear them from my deck and watch them on the TV so it was almost like I was there.

Anyhoo, going to go to work and figure out where my keys went, I am thinking they went flying out of my purse when I went down in flames in front of the Hilton. I may go there, look for them and discuss the dangers of their sidewalk with the lady at the front desk on my lunch break.

time machine

It’s good to know that I am always one run and one fist pump away from a good mood. I woke up a little creaky, fell asleep even before the Bachelorette was over (so I don't know if she sent Chris home or not I hope she did). The 330am wakeup calls my brain has on a nightly basis are catching up with me so I was tired! During my run I am watching these stages go up for tonight and the 4th! I love my city! This summer is really rolling right along and I am loving it!

The sold out concert is tonight Def Lep and Poison and its inside at the arena. The plan is to watch free concerts by the river and head inside the time machine back to the 80s! I am pretty excited to see Bret Michaels since I have this connection with him after watching him French kiss strippers over and over over on his reality show Rock of Love.

I have my speech prepared I that I will give to myself before I leave...it rhymes with Ro Prefrets

Life is short

I don't have time to maintain these regrets. That is my new thing. I have come to the conclusion that I constantly feel regret. The reasons behind these regrets can range anywhere from the smallest, stupidest thing all the way to life altering decisions (although most of my life altering decisions are made with the help of my advisory board) but there are the occasional snap decisions that no one has a say in. From now on, I am going to ask myself, will I regret this decision before I make it? I want to wake up every morning and feel nothing but happiness with the way I spent my time the day before. And if I have to get "No Regrets" tattooed on my body to make that happen, then so be it. Nothing went on this weekend to prompt that just so ya know. Well that is not true; my co-worker, Jenner, had everyone from work over for a pool party cookout. I left way too early, I should have stuck around and put some face time in with the bosses and their wives. But no I had to scurry off, I regretted it and I just have to realize that it could have been a lot worse. I could of gotten drunk, made a fool out of myself by rapping and making obscene gestures to the song “Baby got Back” on the diving board or something. But I didn’t I simply left before I should have and that’s the little dumb things that cause the feeling of regret in my belly. No more! Ok it may be time to get my first tattoo.

I don’t regret anything that happened on Friday cause I got to spend it with my wonderful Dad  and yesterday the only regret is not reapplying the sunscreen on my nose, not a big fan of Rudolph or skin cancer for that matter.  Regret is a tough pill to swallow because it’s something that I can control and if if I can alter my decisions just a smidge, I think I can make a big difference in my own life. Like I said before, I don’t have time to maintain these regrets. If I do decide to get a tattoo saying "No Regrets" will I regret it? That is the question.