I am cracking up right now at my Mom's
story she just told me and emailed me. Their two Pit bulls were barking their
heads off today and she couldn't get them to shut up, since they usually listen,
she decided to investigate. She finds this 6 foot long snake coiled in the
fence hissing and striking at the dogs while they were going crazy! The dogs
would get closer to make a move, the snake would strike, the dogs would jump back and this song and
dance went on for a while. My Mom calls my dad all frantic, he tells her to
grab the ho and whack it, she decides to instead jump in the middle of the
madness, point, aim and shoot...pepper spray! She pepper sprayed (what she now
knows from looking on the internet) a poisonous rat snake. Mom saves the day!
She said the dogs came inside immediately after and fell on the floor laughing.
HA!
Wait, actually, let me just cut and
paste her email and you can see the back to back mother/daughter version of the
same story:
Hey y'all, (this email is only to me, so
I am not sure you “y’all” is J)
I accepted the changes on day 4, which just included a couple of spelling and
punctuation errors. Please look at the errors on day 5 and click Review/Accept
if you do. Remember the corrections for the future. :)
Today I had an amazing experience.
The dogs were barking, so I went outside to quiet them and preventing them from
getting too excited, especially in the heat. Pits are high maintenance and
cannot take the heat. I yelled at them but they wouldn't even turn my way. Then
I saw why. A long snake was looped on the fence by the driveway, and the dogs
were barking out of their minds. The snake would coil and lunge at the dogs.
And they lunged back.
We have some pepper spray and I
finally decided the dogs would soon lose their energy and not get out of the
way of the snake's hissing and biting; so I called dad, gave him the low-down
and he approved my plan to spray the snake in the eyes! I moved on the side
opposite the dogs and gave it a good spray. It immediately left. It seems uneventful
as I write it, but I was having a fit.
We went into the house where the dogs flopped down on the cold basement floor,
grinning and panting. They had had quite an adventure. So had I. Later I
checked it out on the net and came up with a similar snake --- a rat snake
which is poisonous. Yikes! It was around 6 ft. long.
I like your storytelling a lot
better!!
Have a fantastic day!
mama lou
On that note, I would like to
apologize for lying to my mother last night. I told her that I was going to
have dinner with Kelly, when really I was going on a blind date with Mr.
Conflicted. I had a good reason for lying; I didn't want to jinx the date! We
had been having a fun time over email, text, phone and I wanted to keep up the
flow, so I didn't tell anyone. This guy is as equally, if not more, superstitious
as I am, so I rolling with the tone of our “connection” as complete superstitious
lunatics. He goes as far as taking a swig of the shower water before he turns
it off and spits it down the drain. This resembles him getting rid of the bad
luck before he starts his day. He is a huge sarcastic smartass and I totally
jive with that personality for some reason. :) Here is the conflicting part
that I learned from our date at the Mexican restaurant. He is this bad ass
officer in the army who just got back from standing behind the enemy lines in
Afghanistan. He is muscular and stout, but not all that tall. He is actually my
height and with my 1/2 inch heels, I was taller. Apparently tall is not in the
cards for me, I am ok with that as long as he over compensates with personality.
During our phone calls and text I am noticing a girly, fruity side to this
military hard ass. He sounds a bit valley girlish and he totally threw me when
this tatted officer ordered a frozen strawberry margarita. He then shows me his
"bestie" tat that he has on his arm that he and his best guy friend
share....that’s a new one. I thought that only 14-years-old girls shared BFF
necklaces and such, but what do I know. I did actually LOL at his stories that
he has from his lastes experiences with the being face to face with the Taliban
and having his "terb" translate for him. The stories were amazing
and unreal and quite entertaining, I can't imagine going through anything like
that. He made my "bonus quest" seem like very small potatoes.
I think that this is a good segway
into the fact that I GOT MY BONUS! I got what I wanted and I am so pumped! My
bosses are awesome and super good peeps! I am so lucky and so proud of myself for
being so ballsy. Yea buddy, that is the incentive I needed to do great things
at this place!
Anyhoo, my date went good, I am glad I went, still not sold,
but that is what second dates are for. He texted me and told me that he had a
blast and that I was awesome and that he couldn't wait to see me again. To sum
it up, he was a gentleman, he did text and ask me what my fav part of the date
was, that was the first time I have ever had to give a review. I told him
"I have to pick just one?"
We are going to watch the Sounds play tomorrow night, I need to
get this fem solider around some man sports and see what happens. I really hope
he is not reading this; him being in Special Ops and all, probably knows how to use
Google…..
Tomorrow I will tell you about the dream my Dad had about his dog walking across the street in flip flops and diving into a swimming pool. Good night!
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