That's a wrap! (part 3)

We got up on Sunday refreshed and ready to take on the day. Brandy and I went to the grocery store to prepare for our next amazing meal. We had no plan for the day; we hadn't really been in the casino except for a little Roulette after dinner, which was a blast of course. After the store we decide to get one last casino fix in, what the hell, let’s go to a casino while we’re in Vegas, crazier things have happened I’m sure.

We wadded up a couple of large bills and threw them in the garbage and decided to head to the pool. Brandy and I spent the rest of the day at the pool laughing hysterically at whatever was coming out of our mouths. Our lovely host was taking it easy on the couch until it was time to cook for us. Hats off to the Chef Jeff, it was so yummy.

Bellys full, smiles on, and it’s now time to hunker down and get ready for the 5am wake up call.

Oh Vegas, how much fun you were, can't wait to see you again. All in all great trip! I would like to give myself a shout out as I didn’t lose anything!!! Well only one thing, but it wasn’t realized until I am on the way to the airport and it’s time to tell them (Brandy and Jeff are taking me to the airport, she had to stay there and work) what airline to drop me off at. I am assuming I am just getting back on American, and the small details on the itinerary are lost. AAHH! Thank goodness the brain of the operation has a smart phone and can find her own itinerary at the very least. We assumed it was close to the same since we were both going through Denver. So now I am about to be dropped off at the airport and I get to find the plane that’s gonna take me home. I got lucky, the first guy I talked to at Frontier promised to let me on and check my bag for free. I promptly gave him some cash for not making me wander aimlessly around the airport begging people to let me on board. Woo hoo, ok no harm no foul. I made home safe and sound, even though the screaming babies that surrounded me made me wanna test out the slide near the emergency exit. Holy crap, a baby on the left and the right, in the front and the back. I think the one in the back won the screaming contest; it was a toss-up with the one in the front.

And that’s a wrap, now it’s time to wrap up the summer and this crazy August with my AXO girls! The same rat pack from college has been getting together every year for years and years  (like 15 years or so) and this year we are hanging at the pool in Manchester. So happy to be only be making the hour long drive. So excited to see everyone, so sad our Mother Hen, Amber, will not be there to look after us.L Looks like I am going to have to step up and try and fill her shoes, good luck everyone.

 

Vegas Baby! (part 2) Chow time!

After we got back from a perfect day on the water we are ready to chow down! It’s time to shower and look dazzling for dinner. Oh but wait let me go and fish my makeup out of the cooler. Why wouldn't I take my bronzer, blush brush, eye shadow and mascara to the river? To stop it from melting I wrapped it in a grocery bag and set it gently in the ice. Hours later the ice had melted and my makeup was pretty much mush and goo. Sweet. Whatever, I was able to use our resources and make myself presentable.

Our tour guide, Jeffery, packed up his two bitches and took us to the highest point in Vegas, The Stratosphere. Of course there are no last minute reservations happening on a Saturday night to this 5-star joint, except when you’re with people who know people. Jeff is all kinds of dialed in the restaurant industry being the one of top meat peddlers on the strip. We got right in and escorted VIP style to the money table overlooking the entire city. The restaurant is called The Top of the World and it slowly rotates so you don't miss one single light bulb in Vegas or the orange clouds fresh off the sunset. The head chef, Claude, came out to our table, Jeff’s introduced us and before we knew it we were presented with an all-out feast. It was time to put our napkins in our laps, be on our best behavior and dig in!

Our table is now covered with deliciousness....anything we wanted we got and then some. Shrimp, lobster ceviche, caprice salad, Foie Gras (duck liver), pork belly, crab legs, scallops, crap cakes and that was just the appetizers for cryin out loud. We now had rib eyes coming with mushrooms and asparagus. Thank goodness we were starving! It was so decadent (I don't get to use that word nearly enough). The duck liver was a huge hit surprisingly enough. Jeff kept going on and on about this damn pork bell all day and how it was a must eat. I couldn’t wait to try it, until I did. It was this pork cooked with a layer of fat around it. I guess I missed that part of the description because I just cut off the layer of fat and ate it, yuck. I politely disregarded it and assumed that he was crazy. We had a good laugh later when I realized my mistake; I need a do-over on the pork belly. Before the main course arrived, we met another buddy of his, the other main Chef Rick. He was hilarious, they both were and Rick just got done being on one of those Chef reality shows, very cool.

One of the main things we wanted to do was ride the rides on top of the Stratosphere, we had to rethink this plan as we didn't want to waste all that good food on the sidewalk below.

Jeff was such a sweetie to bring us there and treat us to an amazing dinner that I will never forget, mostly because I am still digesting it.

 

 

Part 3 tomorrow

 

Vegas Baby! (part one)

What what!!! Best trip Vegas ever!!

First things first....whatever you do DO NOT say Happy Birthday to your own mother while you're in Vegas. It’s bad luck. Holy crap Mommy I am so sorry! I totally flaked on telling the most wonderfully beautiful Mommy I could find…. Happy Birthday!!! AAAAHHH! I love you Mom, Happy belated! I was just waiting so I could be super dramatic about how much you mean to me! You don't act or look a day over 48 so I am very very excited to wish you a very very happy 68th birthday! xoxoxoxoxo! (They are holding your present at the store; they said they will give it to me in exchange for money, its sitting right next to the "How to be a Good Daughter" book... I'm gonna pick up a copy when its comes out in paperback)

Ok so Vegas, LOVED every minute of it! Brandy and I had a freakin blast! We started out at the airport....um hello live music at Tootsies in the airport! Only Nashville! Loved it, it totally set the tone while we are waiting on the longest plane ride ever! We finally got to Vegas, it being 2am our time, we were in a dark vessel waiting to get off the plane, we had fully talked ourselves into going straight to bed once we got settled. UM NOPE. Brandy's wonderful cousin and his friend picked us up from the airport and we quickly got in for the ride of our lives, literally. Homeboy was a crazyass driver and I was searching for the nearest seatbelt, thank goodness he packed us a roadie for the 20 minutes trip to the house. We got there and the "fixer upper" that he described was actually a FABULOUS desert home with all the fixins. Everything two girls from Tennessee could of asked for...pool, outside bar, 3 beds, air hockey, dart board, circle game and wonderful company. The first night we all got know each other and hung out until freakin 530am our time. I got to sleep on leather futon in the office. I felt like I was sleeping on a concrete slab draped with designer sheets. I am lying there wondering how in the world I could be in this house where everything is top knotch, I am dirt tired, should be able to sleep on nails, but am stuck on this iron maiden. The next morning, 4 hours later to be exact, Brandy comes out to see me wide awake and I told her to come and lay on my "bed" to see how it feels. Right about that time, her cousin, Jeff, lifts his head from his pillow and says, “Hey Steph, I think I forgot to put out the cushions when I made your bed! WHAT??!! HA, yea ya did, and we laughed hysterically.

So now we are heading into the most adventurous Saturday we’ve had in a long while.

Hoover Dame bound baby!  We arrive at the bridge where you can spit off the side and watch it sail into the river, where people can jump off when they feel hopeless and the place with the best view ever! We walked across the bridge long enough to cross into Arizona, took a couple of pics and decide it’s time to get on a boat. We rented a boat for a half a day and Captain Jeff took us for a ride down the Colorado River. Amazing scenery, Brandy and I could not get enough. We motor boat past some serious cliffs until we found one that looked like a good jumping off point . First things first, jump in to hypothermic waters; we now know what 1000 needles feels likes pinging into our bodies. Jeff scaled this cliff and showed us how it was done. Um ok great job Jeff, let’s go. Nope, Stephanie you are up! Ok fine, sure I can climb up a side of a cliff just to jump off, no problem. Jeff is behind me talking me through every scary step and questionable landslide. At one point I froze and told him I couldn’t do it, he quickly turned into the cliff whisperer, "Yes you can, it’s just like walking" Um this is not how I walk! I walk every day and it doesn’t involve testing out loose rocks to see if they told my weight. We finally get to the top, we sat there taking in the scenery as I yell out random words just to hear how annoying my voice really is as it echoes through the Sierra Nevada Mountains.  I am with Jeff and he is slowing talking me into jumping to my death. He has a video camera on us so I just stare at the camera the entire time like it’s my focal point before giving birth.  He grabs my hand, counts to three and I scream bloody murder for about 35 feet. Holy crap….that was amazing!!!

OK Brandy, you're up! Hell no she says! Brandy is terrified of heights but was determined to do it, so we go to a different cliff that didn't require rock climbing. We made it to the top, Brandy, Jeff, me and a video camera in tow. We all jumped at once and will forever be bonded by our fearless act and general awesomeness. We have it all on tape; everything from Brandy's scared as hell face to Brandy popping out of the water laughing hysterically! Hey hey hey euphoria, what’s up?!!!! Way to face your fear girl!

We did it a few more times; the last jump took me about 1-2 hours. It required a total commitment of running, taking a blind jump and clearing a landing below the peak to make it to the water. What?? Keep in mind Jeff told us he chickened out twice before on this particular cliff....um ok good to know (this was actually my motivation). I stood up there and had a few hundred false starts. I was way over thinking it....there was no way around it; he was going to have to kiss me to make my wheels stop turning. He grabbed my face, kissed me and I took off like Flo Jo (RIP) jumped for my life, sailed over the landing and landed in the water like a champion. Brandy, who was treading water waiting on me the entire time with the help of her two built in floatation devices, was probably more excited that I was! WOO HOO! Good Stuff!

Both of us could sleep well that night with zero regrets!

Part two...tomorrow

 

Leeeeeavin on a jet plane!

Went to lunch with Hank today....he is such a sweetie. We had a great 45 minutes; we just talked and laughed talked and laughed...my two favorite things. My flip flops were no help at all when I nearly busted my ass. The pavement right outside the restaurant was wet and I went sliding across the sidewalk. I grabbed ahold of him to catch my balance and he yells out..FLASHBACK! He had to take a minute to thank the stars that he didn’t have to peel me off of the ground and carry me to the car again. It was good for a quick laugh before heading back to the office.

Ok this is me signing off until Monday! Me and my Bestie Brandy are leaving on a jet plane to Vegas tomorrow! Woohoooo!!! I just had a little talk with myself: Stephanie, we are not going to lose our license and not be able to get back on the plane like a previous trip to Vegas. Stephanie, we are going to surrender all spending monies to Brandy. Stephanie, we will not fall and break anything. Most importantly Stephanie, do not, I repeat do not, lose your phone because you know no one’s number and you will be lost forever. If I can manage all of those things my chances are pretty good on having a blast. Actually screw it, I am going to just give all of my belongings to Brandy and go buy a leash.

Wish us luck!

 

Holy Hot Seat!

Um what happens when you go out to lunch with a boy who reveals that he stumbled onto your blog and read the entire thing cover to cover. I'll tell you what happens, your stomach tightens up and the heat is nothing like the hot seat you are sitting in. You are thankful you are outside so at least the sunglasses are covering the wheels turning inside your head trying to think of the things you just wrote about him.

First of all, hey Jason! Welcome to my world, so glad you could join, enter at your own risk. Needless to say, he had some questions. I was not at all prepared to be interrogated and certainly was not prepared for a guy I just met to be completely in the know about my daily antics this past year. I don't recommend anyone reading a years’ worth of the day in the life of Spazwell. It’s way too much to take in; it’s a small doses kind of read.

Most people are thrilled to get a shout out in the ol blog, I’m not sure this was the case. I told him that my blog is a one sided discussion between me and my homies who I no longer interact with on a daily basis and with that comes sorta semi-full disclosure. He did say that some of it seemed to be exaggerated. Um nope it’s all a very true play by play of Single Spazwell life. Trust me, I don’t exaggerate about slobber leaking out of my pen top onto my shirt while in a meeting with my boss. Nevertheless, this is a sounding board not meant to hurt feelings so I do apologize and will be considering going private for only my followers to see.

Anyhoo, here is the most unbelievable part, after all that,  he still wants to see me and I am pretty sure he wants to burn the Team Hank shirts. I told him I needed to think about it since at the time he was telling me I was looking for the nearest shovel to dig my way out of this situation so I could find the nearest rock to crawl under.

Long story short, I think Jason is a super nice guy and for him to know everything about me and still want to date me speaks volumes and he may need is head examined. To be continued on this subject....

 

Facebook rejections

Well not much to report, had a huge play fight with Hank via email today. He got mad cause I rejected his friend request on Facebook. He was just kidding I think, but he was offended on some level. I told him to stop being a baby. What’s up with that?

The last guy I liked, the guy who I went to Dave n Busters with, I can't even remember his name, "broke up" with me because I de-friended him on Facebook. I don't want him to know about the blog and I shouldn't have ever accepted his request but come on! Really? If that is gonna get you upset then what's gonna happen when I start hiding dirty dishes under the bed cause I don't want to wash them? My dumb guy phase is getting old; I think it’s time for another hiatus. Amber created “Team Hank” T-shirts for real, so I will wait for it to come in the mail and continue to bicker with him over dumb stuff. I do still have my lunch date in the park tomorrow but we all know that’s going nowhere. I am aware that all of these POF guys are imaginary and my future cowboy is just around the corner.

checklist needed

Ok so I went out with the tall dude on Thursday...twice in one day. We were supposed to have some calamari at a fancy restaurant but ended up having a 6 inch sub at Subway cause the wait was too long. Things went fine, he was pretty much an open book and I didn’t have to guess at a whole lot. I didn't need to ask him his name because it was written on his arm. I didn't need to ask if he went to college, the massive class ring gave that away (he’s 36). I didn't have to ask if he was a party animal cause that was written on the other arm, and the other tat of the Tasmanian devil spoke for itself. What else was there to find out? Oh wait he is tight with all the Titans and all the country music stars, so basically the name dropping skills are top notch. He was nice enough, he did make me laugh, he let me speak freely and was a gentleman. We went out for coffee later that night cause I had to find a way to stay awake to pick up Megan from the bus stop at 1130pm on a school night. It went fine, I apparently passed all of his tests and he didn't leave me in the middle of the date like he has in the past with other girls.

He wants to take me to lunch on Wednesday and I am gonna let him, he is entertaining enough for another hour long meal. You never know, I could fall madly in love with him, so we are gonna give him a shot.

I showed Megan a fun time. I left her in my apartment while I went to work for a half a day and came home to her chomping at the bit to get out of my cave! I left her a half a can of peas and some mustard in the fridge, so I am not sure what the problem was it being 1pm and all. It was good to see her, a quick, easy day and half and she was back on the bus to her next stop, Louisville. Thanks for comin up girl!

Needless to say I was exhausted the next morning but got in the car with Vickie and her husband to make the trip over the mountain.  I found out it’s much better with people to talk to during that trip. Of course I left my phone in the car when they dropped me off at Sarah's. Sarah wasn't answering her door cause she was in the shower. I had to go and knock on doors to use random people's phone to call my phone. Vickie ended up turning around and bringing it back, thank goodness!

As I said before, we had a quick blast with my Sarah and her friends, had one last lunch at the Derby with Janeen and Sarah (our spot) on Sunday. We got back to the house just in time for Vickie to pick me up and we were off, but not before we turned around to go get my phone that I left at Sarah's! Oh me oh my I need like a checklist to carry with me at all times. Phone check, license check, debit card check, brain check check!

end of an era

Brain dead!!! Can't think, Thursday through today has been one big blur. How in the world I fit in 2 dates, a Megan dive bomb, honky Tonkin and a trip to Atlanta is beyond me. I can't even keep up with myself. Farewell sweet Sarah, I had so much fun wrapping up an era in Atlanta yesterday.  Janeen flew in from NYC and I hitch hiked with a work friend and her husband to Atlanta.  Sarah is moving back to the Burgh and we had to have one last hoorah. We did it up right; us three are not scared to have a laugh and let loose. I think we laughed more than we talked. I am gonna have to go into the deets later of these past few days, right now my brain is not cooperating with my fingers. I am like hunting and pecking trying to locate the K and the T. It’s pretty embarrassing so maybe I just come back to it later. I can't wait to talk about my wonderful necklace and the cards that are still coming in the mail for my Baptism. Sarah got me a necklace with a cross and a card. Meredith sent me a card, thanks girl! Sarah was all geared up to cry as she read my farewell card until she opened it up and it was left blank. Sometimes the best things are left unsaid, sometimes filling in the blanks and using your imagination is better. Here's what I was going to write had I remembered to write it:



Pittsburgh is so lucky to have one of their own return to brighten the skies and just in time for football!! I am sure glad you came into my world, it’s been a better place ever since. Thank you for being a true blue friend and playing such an important role in my life. xoxoxoxoxo

Go Stees!

a girl's gotta eat

I ran out of salad mix, so I have scheduled lunch date for myself today. I know POF sucks but sometimes it’s fun to go on it and punch in an order for a free meal. This guy has checked a few things off my list; we are calling him "perfect on paper" guy. Tall, has a truck, loves country music, good job, extremely cocky I mean confident, owns his own home on the lake, has a boat, dog, no kids but wants them, works out and seemingly pretty funny. The jury is still out on his looks and I don’t know if he talks like a fruit basket yet, but J. Alexander’s is super nice and lunch is only an hour. Based on our endless texting, my prediction is that he is going to talk about himself the whole time and won’t ask me a single question. The good news is that he can tell if he has a future with a girl in the first 10 minutes and he won't waste time with a girl if he doesn't see a future with her. I told him that I hope I don't have anything in my teeth during the first 10 minutes. Marybeth once said I get more free meals that anyone she's ever met. It’s true.

For those of you on “Team Hank”, we are still talking, I will let you know when Amber receives the T-shirts she ordered. He invited me to Tunica this weekend but I am all booked up. Megan is coming in tonight! Woooohooooooo!!!!! So excited! She is getting in 1130pm straight off the mega bus. Ok more on my weekend later!

back in action

Yesterday was rainbows and butterflies all day long! I worked out for the first time in 40 day and 40 nights! I am not completely healed but enough to get on the elliptical. I had roses waiting on my desk from Vera, people were coming up to my desk all day and hugging me, my boss made a special trip to my desk to congratulate me. I got some cools presents from my Mom and Dad the week before, one being my Grandma's ring which I opted to wear for fear of stopping the ceremony to go diving after it. I got a present from Amber and her mom, I got a free lunch out of it, I think I'm gonna get baptized every week!



Ok gotta got go, the one cloud over my day is making me go in early.

New beginnings part 2

Whoa what a day!!! Some amazing things have happened today. I get to the church, go back stage and get the low down on how this all works. It’s not just me, it’s several people getting baptized today. I have my change of clothes, towel in tow and go to find a place to sit until we are called up. I saw my boss on the way to my seat, he said he was very proud of me and was going to take a video of it. Very cool of him to do this so I can show everyone. I go to sit down by myself, look up and there is Brandy standing in front of me with this huge smirk on her face. Holy crap! I was floored she totally surprised me, I had no idea. I pick my jaw up off the floor, tears flying out of my eyeballs, I go to hug her and there stands Amber and her mother, Kathy. What????!!! Jaw back on the floor and I am just gonna leave it there. I can't take it, they just drove 4 hours to surprise me and see me get baptized. WOW! I can count on one hand how many times that I have been surprised and the feeling is always amazing but this feeling cannot be described. I was prepared to do this by myself but having my Bestie and two very important people in my life show up was truly something I will never forget.

Boy am I glad I showed up! I could just picture me oversleeping and a row of people cussing me out in church. After we sang some songs and listened to the sermon I made my way backstage to change.  I was super nervous, I got called up, walked down into the water, got dunked and was washed clean, it was really good feeling. I changed, came back to my seat and Brandy is in tears. WHOA! I don't know which is part is crazier, the fact that I am getting baptized or people crossing state lines to see this or the fact that Brandy is not only in church but crying too.

We all went to lunch and had a really good time sitting on a patio on Broadway. Now they can picture where all of the insanity goes down. Amber wanted to know if I brought a pair dry underwear to change into, nope I just took them off, "So you got baptized commando??!" Yep I sure did, it was quite liberating actually.

I promised a huge shout out to everyone involved....Amber, what what! Kathy, woot woot! Brandy, hey hey hey!

I am so blessed to have such wonderful people in my life and according to Brandy I am free to do whatever in the heck I want now and all will be forgiven. Ha good to know girl and just in time for a trip to Sin City!

New beginnings

Today I am getting Baptized! Better late than never I always say. I am a bit nervous, there are going to be a lot of people starring at me and I don't have any waterproof mascara. OK I am gonna stop talking about it now, my wheels are turning and I need to get ready. Do I bother doing my hair? The instructions that they emailed  me specifically said to bring a DARK colored T-shirt to wear and tuck it in. I can only imagine the kind of trial and error that occurred to made this email imperative. Wet T-shirt Baptism!
OK wish me luck, I will report back in a bit.

slow my roll!

Ok dating on POF is not a numbers game or a crap shoot, it’s the actually the definition of insanity. Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Well rather than spell out another ridiculous story, I am just going to display the transcripts of the text messages between me, Brandy, the new guy from this evening:

It started by me sending a pic of the new guy I started talking to today and the captions said “meet my new boyfriend” and he’s at a pool.

Me: He just moved here from Buckhead and he is a GA fan…he is funny..so far

B: Wait have you met him in person? Is that your pool?

Me: No he just sent that to me…we started talking about an hour ago…we’ve already talked on the phone, I need to find out if he sounds like a valley girl sooner than later. We were talking about the GA/Fla game and I asked if it was in GA or FLA this year. I’m such an idiot. We had a good laugh.

B: I don’t get it

Me: It’s always in Florida

B: Oh. I didn’t know that. I’ve never noticed that. That’s F’d up. I’m starting a revolution.

Me: It’s in Jacksonville..Neutral territory…its tradition…it’s all good girl..no one is mad about it

B: Oh good cause I am tired and a revolution is more that I’m ready for

(Insert random texts from new guy )

New guy:  Oh honey I was so enjoying our conversation! Ur so easy to talk to! I really like that! Have I mentioned how beautiful you are!

New guy: U r a sweet heart babe! I’m sweet and treat woman very well! I was raised by my momma so I only know one way to treat a woman and that’s good. Not a sweet talker just genuinely beautiful

New guy: I will treat you better than any man had ever thought about treating you! Muah! Muah!

New guy: I’m gonna call you and play you a song on ur voicemail! Don’t answer. Please respond to tell me u won’t answer but I want to call you after u hear the song beautiful.

Me: holy crap ok

New guy: Ok well tell me if you could hear it or not babe.

(I call him to tell him I heard it and that I have to go and then I realized he was drunk and wouldn’t let me off the phone so I nicely hung up)

New guy: I’m sorry if I upset you hunny! I would have to say ur the most amazing woman I’ve met on here! I really wanna meet you beautiful! Please gorgeous! Ur amazing! MUAH!

New guy: Please respond honey or did I screw this up?

Me: OMG you are gonna feel silly when you sober up

New guy: Im sorry hunny I just don’t want to ruin this! U seem like a very wonderful woman! I didn’t want to get off the phone with you yet babe!

New guy: you can kick my ass later please! Im so sorry beautiful sweet dreams gorgeous!!

New guy: Im sorry Baby! Please forgive me!

Me: dude chill!! I am not sure why you are spazing out

New guy: K ur right I’m gonna feel silly tomorrow sweet dreams beautiful!! I am so sorry Stephanie

New guy: Please forgive me babe please!!

The End. Then I forwarded a couple  messages to Brandy:

Brandy: O.M.G

Me: I miss “Red Flag Same Shirt”

Brandy: His red flag is draped around him like a superhero. You officially have the worst taste in men

Me: He told me on the phone he wanted to take me on a date when he gets paid on the 25^th

Brandy: Flag 1 if he’s broker than you than just eat peas alone and you won’t have to shave your legs. ..Flag 2: Drunk on Thursday ..Flag 3: drunk dialing on day 1.. Flag 4: he’s from Buckhead

Me: Did I mention that he is a 33-year-old full time student and hanging out with his  under age classmates he carpools with, I was overlooking it cause he just got out of the army and they are paying for his school.

Brandy: See what happens when you overlook things? I have taken showers that last longer than your relationships

Brandy: maybe the screening process for giving out your number should be a little more in depth

Me: maybe….or maybe I just give them your number and you screen them…we could make you a checklist

B: Don’t u dare send your crazies here.

B: you may have to block him. Shall we call him Captain Apology or drunken stalker?

Me: Apologetic stalker. Stage 5

Me: later we’ll come up with the lyrics to my theme song “Ode to a Red Flag”

B: Jeff Foxworthy is making a CD inspired by your love life” You Might a Red Flad if ____”

Me: Ha! There will be enough songs for a Greatest Hits Album

Me: These are the days of our lives

B: Not ours. Yours. I’m fine with talking to myself and petting one of the cats

Me:Well ok then go light a candle and rock yourself to sleep while I line up another song for Jeff Foxworthy

B: ok. I’m gonna watch the Real L World and figure out a way to slow your roll

Me: but I don’t wanna be a lesbian

B: I’m not looking for your next love interest. I’m just getting away from straight couples for an hour. Because even lesbians aren’t as crazy as your boyfriends

Me: and that is the sad truth

flicker flicker fail fail

I saw my parents on Sunday and had lunch with them on the way out of town. So good to see them as always, they are both looking and doing great! I had to return the monitor back to my boss's office before anyone noticed. So I am currently sitting very still with my busted up monitor, I'm holding it at an angle while holding my breath with one leg in the air as its about to flicker out. I don't have much time, I need to get this fixed. I brought home a cord to hook up to the TV (a suggestion by many people) but forgot that my TV that Brandy gave me was made before they were flat. You know back when the TV makers thought that all the TVs should weigh more than the house so that once you got them into the living room you'd be forced to keep it forever. Long story short, it doesn't have the plug-in area that I need. I will try to come up with a different plan tomorrow. I am thinking its going to magically fix itself, I can feel it.

ketchup time

Hey kids, this blog is dedicated to all the people who yelled at me for not blogging for 4 days (you know who you are). I was in Atlanta for a wedding and I came home to find a spastic laptop going haywire! Thank goodness for Facebook, I was able to get my laptop problem diagnosed by THE computer wizard, Mike, a friend from WAY back in the day. The ribbon is blown in my monitor so I borrowed a monitor from work and now have everything hooked up ghetto style. It’s a bit annoying to have one flickering screen in my face and one good screen to the side, but anything to get the Goodwin family off my back :)

Nervous Nelly was so much fun! My hard work could be paying off. This whole online thing is a numbers game and a crap shoot and I have been improving my odds tremendously by simply not giving up. I walk up to Dave and Busters and he’s actually cute, yay! We sit down and start talking like we've known each other for years, double yay! We totally got a long during the initial meet and greet interview session. We were being people watched by a couple sitting next to us who bet that we were on a first date. Ha, they totally called us out, next thing we knew they sent over a round of drinks called “Love potion number 9” and we ended up exchange numbers. I went on a date and scored another chic’s number. I let him beat me at all kinds of games and we had some good wholesome fun.  This is the first time in a while I don't have to talk myself into going out with him again, that's huge!

We stayed out pretty late so the next day I suffered through work and then off to Atlanta I went. Got to Christine’s about 930pm and had a house full of people waiting on me. Such an awesome feeling to come walk into a living room full of my old pals. Christine put out a spread of food and Patti surprised me by showing up when she told me she couldn't be there. I love surprises! Alicia, Elisabeth, Josh, Burrell, Jim and Seth all made it such a fun night.

Saturday was a whirlwind of course. I did not follow through with my plan to not book every hour of the day. This time I utilized my time management skills a little better and made it happen somehow. I managed to not go missing and actually made it to breakfast with Sarah. We had a perfect time, lots of laughs and took up this table for hours catching up on everything. I scored some hand-me-down makeup and a breakfast, free food and used lipsticks is my kind of Christmas! That was the last time her and I will have our breakfast date at Goldberg’s since she is moving. I am glad I decided to show up this time. Thanks for the memories girl!

After a landslide of coffee, I head out to my next appointments. Pedicure, rotated the tires, met my Hudson girls for lunch, stopped by to see Gary/Jake and then back to Christine’s to get ready for the wedding. My good friend LilSteph finally tied the knot with a boy she met on EHarmony. Sure glad I drove all the way to Atlanta to see the last 15 seconds of the wedding. Yep, true to form, I totally got lost and ended up at Six Flags when I was supposed to be in downtown Atlanta. (my GPS is so fired). I managed to quietly sneak in the back row, sat down, they said "You may kiss the bride" I stood back up, clapped and jumped back in the car for another 20 minute trip to the reception.

When I got there I had a reality check, yep I was all by myself. I know a fair amount of people from a distance but definitely didn’t have any sidekicks to pal around with like I normally do. So I walked around aimlessly asking random people if I could hang out with them. I cornered her parents a couple of times, but they didn't really want to spend all night talking to the loner. I think my hormones got the better of me since I ended up crying way more than I do at funerals. I cried during their entrance, during the first dance, during all four toasts and a little when I sat at the kids table for dinner. I was the unstable girl in the corner acting like I was overwhelmed with joy and happiness for the newlyweds. LilSteph looked beautiful, her family was awesome and the party was sure to not disappoint. Too bad I had to leave before it got started. But it was 930 and my next appointment was waiting patiently for me at the pub down the road.  It was Marybeth’s birthday weekend and I couldn’t wait to see her. We got to hang out and catch up by ourselves and Christine, Alicia, Patti joined us later. We all had a blast! We watched the Olympics, cheered loudly and laughed like we always do. Happy birthday girl!

Saturday, for the most part, was a huge success, thanks to all my peeps for making it so special.

Nervous Nelly

My computer has been acting crazy these past couple of days and I am nervous. Why don't I have a warranty?! I am gonna try and write while I watch this very intense volleyball game between US and Austria. This has turned out to be one of my favorite events.

Ok so here we go, I wasn’t gonna say anything for a couple of different reasons, one I don't want to jinx it, two I don't wanna hear it. I am going on yet another date from notmytype.com tomorrow night. This guy is super sweet and seemly cute. We have not talked, only texted and he is cracking me up. I think he thinks I am this prim and proper chic who he has to be on his best behavior with. HA! He is a country fella who has admitted that he is nervous to meet me. He has asked what he should wear, he told me he is going to shave his head (hopefully he has done this before) he wanted to make a reservation at a Sushi restaurant and wanted to pick me up. I told him that my Mom told me never to get in the car with strangers so I would meet his there. I told him that he needs to dial this date down to a casual level just in case we hate each other after five minutes. So he changed the venue to Dave n Busters, perfect, I am down with a little ski ball. I am sort of intrigued by his efforts (guys have no idea what little effort it takes to impress me and yet it rarely happens). I have a feeling this dating things is new for him but he has been divorced for over 2 years so we'll see how lil Nervous Nelly plays out.

Ok well wish me luck I have to get back to my test that I am taking for one of my 4 certifications at work. This one is mostly common sense...I am screwed!