runaway ho

Waking up and walking has become my routine, but I am considering switching up my route. I park in my usual spot on 1st avenue and an unwelcomed crazy guy starts walking behind me (he is like 40 yards away at this point). He starts yelling out some obscenities, I turn around and try to figure out what he is saying and if he is actually yelling at me. I make out a few choice words as he gets closer, “Keep on running you F'ing whore!” he yells. “Yea run away you f'ing bitch! Run run run biiitch!!!"  What?!!! First of all, I am walking not running, stop rubbing it in. He continues on with his rant, repeating the same things over and over as he gets closer. I have a choice, do I turn around and explain to him that my ankle is still a little tender from rolling it 98 days ago or do I just follow his instructions a take off running? I decided to skip the explanation and haul ass. He started screaming and waiving his hands at the construction crew on the side of the road and then started in on me again. I guess it’s good to know that I am able to run when necessary. I am all about a good workout, but getting my heart rate up out of fear of ending up on the 5 o’clock news was not what I had mind. I guess it’s time to get some pepper spray and/or a sawed-off shot gun for my next outing.

Got a couple of my homies invading Nashville this weekend. My former bartending colleagues Anna and Meghan are coming to visit! They totally pulled the ol bait and switch on me. They were supposed to stay at the Hilton but a last minute change in plans has them hunkering down at my place. They were worried were invading my space, I told them that I have 734 square feet and they were welcome to 508 of it. Pretty pumped about having some Georgia fans in town for the game Saturday. Anna is mid-break up and Meghan is slightly crazy, this should be interesting.

 

 

 

tights and wings with a splash of music

Last night I went out with my girl Kelly for her birthday. Poor thing has a birthday on September 11th, so I had to make her feel a little special. What a better way to make a girl feel special than to go to Hooter's for dinner. One million restaurants in Nashville that I have yet to try and we go where the 80’s are still going strong. Not that I don’t enjoy a scrunchy sock, nude tights and white high-top Reebox, but this dated vision has lost its flare. I am all for tradition, but I think it’s time for a make-over Hooters.  I do have a question about the shirts. What happens if a girl wants to eat on the day she has to work? Do we get to see the hamburger sitting in her stomach? My gut would definitely test the durability of that piece of cloth. My dinner venue decision making process needs some work. So we had some wings, threw up the deuces and headed out to the Mercy Lounge to listen to some music.

It was Americana night; they had a whole line up of talented, tatted up, soulful musicians including Cumberland Collective. Ah yeah, I think I may be reaching groupie status. The goodie two shoes kind of groupie, the kind that leaves the band on the stage and goes home alone groupie.

We had a front row table and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. The first chic was good I think, it was unfortunate that her camel toe was distracting us from whatever was coming out of her mouth. Girlfriend, mirrors are our friends and those painted on pants are not. Between her and the girls at Hooter’s I had enough showmanship of the girl parts.

Clay’s band was last so we got to hang out with him and couple other band members at our table.  He is a cool dude and definitely a cutie pie, glad we got to kick it. They were amazing of course; too bad they didn't go on until 1030pm! It’s a school night people, we had to duck out and go to bed halfway through the show.

I am ok with getting home at midnight on a Tuesday every now and then, but bed time is a comin early tonight (right after The Voice and Big Brother of course). Brandy is in a hotel watching Big Brother with commercials like some kind of peasant.  I don’t know how she’s gonna do it, stay strong girl, they only last like 30 seconds a piece I hear.

New addition to the world!

I haven't had much to report until today......

Congratulations to my very good friends Meredith and Danny Seelos on their bouncing baby boy Holden Blue Seelos!!!!! So happy for you guys! I can't wait to meet him!

Well that's all I got.

I camped out in my apartment all weekend, cleaned and watch football...GO Dawgs! Way to play some "Old Man football" keep it going I say! The Steelers didn't have as much luck, they got pummeled.

I gave my favorite homeless guy 36 cents today; I’m sure he is so annoyed when he sees my Camry come to the stop light. He is the cutest old man who reminds me of my friend, Seth, they have the same blank stare. I don't mind giving whatever pennies and lint I have in the bottom of my wallet to the homeless people of Nashville, cause they are working for it. They are slinging papers on every corner and it’s cool that they have that opportunity. One day my contributions will add up to a full sale of one paper. The homeless people are pretty much creatures of habit. I spend a lot of time at the park, eating lunch or walking after work and I expect to see the same folks every day. We have the annoying guy who is not scared to knock on my car window and ask for cash when I am trying to eat my lunch, I tell him no every time. His nap time is after work around 5, which is not the best business plan seeing as the park is packed with people. We have the old lady who limps; she doesn’t beg for money, she is happy staking out the garbage cans hoping someone leaves an extra onion ring or some crust from a PB&J. We have the tall black guy at my morning stop light who seems to know everyone, we works it every morning, he’s got jokes and is always laughing. We have the 2 guys fishing every day at the park. Do they eat the fish for dinner? It’s funny how people become fixtures in your everyday life. Maybe I will pack a lunch for my blank stare guy, just as soon as I get some groceries.

This topic reminds me of the time Lindsey gave her leftover breakfast to a guy walking down the street in sweats. The gesture was really nice if he would of been homeless and not just a guy out for his morning stroll. Awkward!

Sarah and I tried to track down a guy we named Ol Blue Eyes (another stop light favorite). It was Christmas so we packed up a care package and set out to find him. This mission was unsuccessful and a bit dangerous as we lurked around guys under blankets in the seedy parts of Atlanta. We ended up dropping the bag off at the foot of this guy sleeping; he woke up, peeked his head out of the blanket, scared the crap out of us so we ran off screaming.

My ex-boyfriend Adam dropped off a big bag of clothes in the middle of a bunch of homeless fellas on the side of the road one day. It was hilarious to drive through that part of town weeks later and see a couple of dudes dressed in his hoodies and khakis.

Well this concludes my homeless segment, tune in next time for stories about my favorite cashiers.

 

 

 

lame blog alert

I feel out of place today. It Saturday and I am at home! Not sure what to do with myself. The past four weekends went like this: Atlanta, Vegas, Atlanta, Manchester. I spent last night sitting on my deck watching the British guy across the way do sit ups, which was a nice change to watching him watch TV. I have never met him but the massive British flag on his wall indicates he is not American.

My apartment has asked me to clean it. It is confused as to why its turned into a landfill. Crap is everywhere! I better get started so I can be done by tonight's game...GO DAWGS!

National Cray Cray Take a Hint Day

Today we are going to discuss hints. The definitions of a hint, what it means to take a hint and the different types of hints.

The definition of a hint:

• A slight indication or intimation
• A brief or indirect suggestion
• A statement conveying information in an indirect fashion

There are all kinds of different types of hints. Hint of lime in the new Tostitos chips, hint of mint in Haagen Daas ice cream, and a hint of cinnamon in Starbucks coffee.  Hints are an important ingredient in life. Taking hints shows that you are aware of your surroundings. If hints are taken properly, there is less chance of awkwardness and/or controversy. If someone offers you up some gum, your breath smells like warm garbage, so take the hint and the gum.

Hints are the seeds that are planted and sometime grow into Blockbusters and Best Sellers. The phrase “He's Just Not that into You” has turned into a concept, a book and a movie. This concept has heightened the awareness of the lack of interest between two people, which ultimately has become a huge time saver, life is short! He and she are interchangeable in this concept. Instead of explaining herself, sometimes a girl would rather disregard a guy she doesn't know better than the guy who bags her groceries. In a perfect world, a girl drops a hint, the guy picks it up and walk away, no harm not foul, no muss no fuss. I have found in recent activity from a couple of different people that this is not always the case. Sometimes ignoring doesn't always work, the hint is not comprehended and the spelling out of the actual words is a must. I am going to spell out of couple of catch phrases as suggestions for those of you going through the same problem:

• It’s Not Me It’s You
• Cray Cray Go Away
• 5 is not better than a 4 on a scale of Clingers

Here is a direct quote straight from my phone to one of the culprits behind today’s message:

"I am not feeling ya...sorry...don't wanna waste your time or mine. Good luck"
Apparently that can be translated into "Please don't ever stop texting me"

 

All I am saying is hints are an important part of the way we communicate, do not ignore them, they are there for a reason, kind of like a STOP sign if you will.

 

peace out summer

Last night's post take two:

And that's a wrap! My first summer in Nashville has come to an end. Had a blast, got a tan, not the kind out of a bottle and I am walking away with some great memories. Labor Day weekend was spent in the country with Brandy, Beth, Nena and Stance, my sorority sisters. We had a good time chillin by the pond, I mean the pool. Poor Brandy has a leak in her pool; it was not filtering the way it was supposed to so it was a bit dirty. Brandy spent a lot of time pouting over her grand debut, poor baby, at least it was only sunny for a few hours on Saturday so it wasn't the main focus anyway. I know how fabulous it usually is and that's all that matters. We watched the Dawgs win their first game of the season, Go Dawgs! So excited football is back, bring it and the fall weather!

I am trying to figure out if I want to buy a tablet or not. Vera at work bought it and then realized that she doesn’t need it so she said I could buy it from her. She said I could make payments, it’s totally badass and pretty impressive but I can think of 499 things I should spend my money on instead. I think I will have to stick with my busted up laptop. OMG as I live and breathe my laptop just started acting up and not responding when I started to do spellcheck! Is that a sign? I think that’s a sign. (I know most of you think I don’t have a spell check, if you saw the before and after you’d know).

The shirt I referred to last night I found in the mail from Sarah, it was a shirt that said Vegas on it. I love how she finds random shirts that make her think of me and she just throws it in the mail. I accidentally stole one of her shirts while I was there and I have yet to make it to the post office, its coming girl! Oh and I love how she sends me cards with actually writing in it, way to go above and beyond girl!

Anyone who sits downs and reads this blasted blog cover to cover in one sitting deserves a shout out….hey Janeen! Welcome aboard girl!

Brandy gets a big fat thanks for offering up her home, putting up with everyone and feeding all of us piglets all weekend. Thanks girl!

 

Ok gotta go to work!

 

 

voice activated

I'm on the voice activator.this blog is being spoken and not written.I am a robot.I'm speaking into this tablet that I may buy.

just wrapped up the rest of the summer with the girls in college. we had a lot of fun.this robot thing is for the birds.I thought it was cool but it's kind of silly.

the girls and I had a good time watching the dawgs ! danced to the Wii the dance Party USA game. so much fun.

I got a shirt and a card in the mail from Sarah. thank you Sarah

whatever.
I will write a blog in the morning


my name is Stephanie and I live in Nashville
wow that came out correct
I guess I just need to annunciate


I'm done backspacing backspacing