I don't even know where to begin. I took for the team; I went against my own pledge for the sake of material. It’s clear that I have been running low on entertaining stuff to write about and needed to drum some up. Sarah suggested that I go live in my car again; in Hein site that suggestion would have been a lot better. I instead chose to go on a quick POF date. I haven't been on this site in forever but got on at lunchtime on Thursday. I had a date lined up by the time I got off work. This guy was seemingly normal over email and I agreed to meet him after work to have a bite to eat and possibly watch some football. He had me laughing in the first 30 seconds so I was pleasantly surprised. Then things started to turn a little coo coo. He is a famous country music writer. He has written hits for Garth Brooks and has at least one of his songs on the radio right now "What Do you Want from Me."
Of course he has my attention but then the red flags started to peek out from under his hat. He wanted me to be the ginny pig for his his realty show idea. The idea being two people meet on a blind date and spend the next 7 days together. Sure, that's a great idea. I am going along with this in the name of my blog. “Why stop there?” I asked him. Seven days doesn't seem long enough, we should do at least nine. He then raised the stakes to 30 days. By the end of the conversation I was moving in with him that night for the next 365 days(I pinky swore I would). This is really happening and he is dead serious. While I am going along with this perfectly normal idea he then tells me that he loves girls with really short hair. He thinks that I should let him shave my head and he would buy me wigs. I am now waiting for Ashton Kutcher to jump out from behind the bar with a video camera in my face. Hell yea I say that is an awesome idea. I could be like Lil Kim and wear a different color wig every day, perfectly normal first date conversation.
Awesome, I have this guy who thinks I am this spontaneous and outrageous girl who is up for anything. I wanted material and I hit the jackpot! He kept saying that it was fate that we met. But then we actually got into a heated argument shortly after. He was going on and on about his music and I had had enough. I told him to stop shoving his music down my throat and I called him a name dropper. You would have thought I told him I hate his mother and then I ran over his dog. He went crazy and I had to get out of there.
I ended up not moving in with him and just went about my Friday like I do every week. But this Friday was a little different. Instead of never hearing from him again as expected, I got bombed with text messages from this lunatic. Text after text of how I broke my word on not moving in with him and how he likes me so much and that he can't wait to see me again. Holy crap, it was the tip of the crazy iceberg. I participated in the most ridiculous text convo you could ever imagine. I said I would meet him again so he would shut up. I told him that I first had to go to Brandy’s to watch the Georgia game but maybe we can hang out on Sunday.
I went to Brandy’s house and showed her the 66 texts that I got over the last 12 hours. It was the most insane display of lunacy I have ever been involved in and that’s saying a lot.
Brandy and I had a great time together as always. Many good laughs, some were at this guy's expense but he was a short lived story. That is until he kept texting me all night to make sure that I was still gonna meet with on Sunday. I just ignored him.
I actually did entertain the idea of meeting in a very public place with lots of witness to get more insane things to write about but I decided I had enough material. Not really feeling like getting tied up and stashed in his truck, I promptly cancelled. There was no way I could go through with it with a straight face. I texted him and told him I wasn't coming and he went BALISTIC! I now have 135 texts, 7 miss calls and a voicemail where I am pretty sure he was crying. "I like you so much Stephanie! I was so excited to see you! I know you like me! Please meet me! You broke your word and I still want to see you! I was going to ask you to be my date to the BMI awards! Just give me another chance! This could be something amazing! I know you miss me! Don’t you feel anything for me?! I was so excited about you! I have told everyone about you!!"
I responded with, “you are a little much for me; I am not interested in dating you, kindly respect my wishes and delete my number.”
He said he would but he hasn't and it’s been nonstop all day. He told me before I knew he was CRAY CRAY that the way he gets over girls (like his last ex-girlfriend) is he writes a song about them and then he is over her. I wonder if I am going to hear a song about me on the radio soon.
Here's the first lyric:
You broke your word
You still have all you hair
You broke you word
You don't even care
You broke your word
You cancelled our date
You broke your word
I guess it wasn't fate
Whoa that’s pretty good! That just came out of nowhere, I had no idea I could write music!
Um where is the delete button on this POF profile? There has got to be better ways to gather material.
He doesn't know my last name thank goodness.
Best blog yet!!!' Jason
ReplyDeleteHind sight :)
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