Friday, December 2, 2011

day 112 last night of being a nomad...sorta

Today has been a whirlwind of emotions. Woke up walking on air. Went to work and got a call, my dad is in the hospital. Ok, well ok, um  well of course I start crying.  My dad has had an episode of what could be a mini stroke. He has had these before and has been in the hospital twice before, dizziness, blurred vision, disoriented, grey, he goes to the hospital and they run every single test they could possibly run and they find nothing. He is as healthy as a horse, both times. Its crazy and frustrating that they can't find one single thing wrong with him, this morning it happened again. My brother calls to say dad is in the hospital and moving day is canceled. Ok well i am a wreck at work, I am worried sick and I am trying to figure out what to do. My dad is supposed to be co-signing for me because of my blemish and now I am conflicted, on how I am supposed to act. I am worried about my dad and feel selfish about worrying about how I am going to get this apartment and move my stuff. So hurdles hurdles everywhere. I decide to leave work early, I am a wreck so my boss tell me to go and its fine. I go straight to the leasing office (mind you I have called them 4 times today and every other day leading up until now). They are sick of me but I don't care. I sit down with the leasing agent. At one point today I consider forging my dads signature and sending it to a notary and having the lease over-nighted. I then find out that is next to impossible by tomorrow. So I sit down with the property manger and we work out a plan to let me pay yet another deposit instead of having a co-signer. It cost me a bunch of money and my soul, but somehow end up signing a lease and get my keys to my new place. wow. I have no idea what just happened, I am in a complete fog, but here I am with keys. So I leave and head out. I wanted to go to Atlanta to be with my family but my mom talked me out of it, saying Ryan was there and we can't even visit dad so not to come. I also thought about going there and renting a U-haul and grabbing my stuff but Brandy talked me out of that too, so I just went to her house. Today was filled with senerio after senerio racing through my brain.  I am a zombie, during the hour drive I spoke with my mom again, my uncle (my dads brother), left a message for my dad, who will be spending the night and possibly the whole weekend in the hospital for more tests and observation. I spoke with my dad earlier and I said  "boy you will do anything to get out of moving" he laughed and said you got that right. So here I am, I have a place and guess what, I am going to round up all of my belonging that I do have and move into my apartment, my furniture will get here when it gets here, not a big deal. For now, all I need is one air mattress, Brandy's TV that she claims she never watches from her bedroom and my clothes. That is all I need and its a good thing cause that is all I have :) I am excited to camp out in my own place, one more adventure. Brandy is putting together a starter kit for me, salt and pepper, a spatula, a fork , a butter knife and lots o sporks from Taco Bell. I am thankful for what I do have and that is a roof over my head. I can say one thing, I will never take for granted having anything ever. I am certifiably humbled in life. Bring it life! I am ready for any hurdle or hiccup you bring my way. Nothing is easy and that's the way it should be. By new apartment has power, a TV, cable, I have my laptop, and Brandy will provide me with sheets, pillow and blankets, that's all I need! My focus is praying that my dad will be ok and my mom will be ok and my brother will help hold the walls up. I know whats most important in life and that is family and friends and I will hang on to them until my knuckles turn from white to blue....cause without them and God, I am mush.

 So that was my day, Brandy and I just watched a movie and now I have to try to exhale and get ready to move my hot pink trunk that I still have from my dorm room. Lordy lordy

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